Recovery

“Recovery” is defined as a return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength. I guess you could then say I am “in recovery.” At my last doctor visit, my diagnoses included Skull Lesion and Status Post Craniectomy. Also “need for influenza vaccination.” Compared with “Skull Lesion” and “Status Post Craniectomy,” the “need for influenza vaccination seems comically insignificant. 

It certainly seems a challenge to return to where I was before all this happened. I am being promised a “full recovery.” I am realizing that’s not enough. My God doesn’t put his child through something like this to return him to the place he inhabited when it all started. 

My God allows and may even create terrifying situations, medical mysteries, holes in skulls, lesions and various …tomies to place his children on higher ground. He doesn’t spin them around just to see them dizzy, confused and feeling abandoned. He wants them grateful for recovery, happy to be alive; but I have to believe He wants them happier to be alive, filled with greater purpose and bearing the scars and experience which will make them invaluable tools for the Kingdom.

So sorry, docs, I appreciate the recovery but I celebrate the closer walk, the higher place, the wider view. I am not returning to a normal state of health, mind, or strength but to a higher place that only God and to a much less extend I can see and feel and understand. My God is Good. All the time.

I celebrate recovery, not as a destination but a path to a closer walk with Him.