There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health. Proverbs 12:18 One out of our young people say they have never had a meaningful conversation with their father. That’s just one of many alarming statistics that could be cited. When it comes to communication most of us stink. We all “know” that communication is vital to any relationship. We just can’t seem to accomplish it. It seems easy enough. We can be sailing along in conversation and one wrong word slips out and suddenly we are at war. It is so frustrating, many give up on it and stop trying altogether. And without the fuel of communication, relationships wither and die. The thing I remember most about my first date with Rosemary was how easily we talked. It may surprise you to know I wasn’t much of a ladies man. I had no experience talking up the ladies. So it was shocking how easily the words flow. We both knew from that first encounter that we were meant for each other. We can give up on communication. It’s too important. Have to acknowledge that it’s not easy but worth […]
Sacrifice
16 We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion—how can God’s love be in that person? 1 John 3:16-17 NLT If we want to be successful in love, we have to be willing to sacrifice. We need to live each moment of each day by the motto “It’s not about me.” This is radical thinking because the prevailing modern attitude is that it’s all about me. There’s proof everywhere we look: our divorce rate, our crime rate, the state of our country. All scream, “It’s all about me.” A selfish attitude is a guarantee of a life of misery. The biggest smiles on Christmas morning are on the faces of those who have learned that lesson. Real joy comes in putting others first. It’s the miracle of sacrifice. Is John telling us we need to give our lives like Jesus did because of the need of others, or because it’s the secret to joyous living? I think in some strange twist it […]
Acceptance
7 Therefore, accept each other just as Christ has accepted you so that God will be given glory. Romans 15:7 NLT We seem to have a natural aversion to anything, or anyone, different. This makes our lives very boring. If we live only with those that are like us we may be more comfortable, but we are a lot less challenged and stimulated. We also have a problem separating the sin and the sinner. Often when we refuse to accept others, we claim it’s because of their sin. But all sin, why do we refuse to accept certain sinners. Sometimes this arises from our own experience. If we specialized in a certain sin before Christ, we are often intolerant of those who suffer from that vice after we are freed from it. There is nothing worse than an ex-anything. Sometimes we avoid certain classes of sinners, because we are sorely tempted in the areas in which they err. Who can forget the famous preacher who hollered about sexual sins by day while prowling prostitute infected motels at night. We are called to hate the sin and love the sinner. We could all do a better job of that. Nick
Deciding to Forgive
If we’re going to enjoy loving relationships, we have to learn to forgive. Hurt follows relationship like night follows day. We can’t deeply connect with another without hurt. In fact, the closer the relationship, the deeper the hurt. But forgiveness seems so hard. Maybe it will help to remember what forgiveness isn’t. Forgiveness isn’t forgetting. When we confess our sins, God forgives and forgets. In case you’re confused, let me set you straight. You’re not God. Don’t expect to have His qualities. Pray that He will help you forget. But forgiveness is a decision that doesn’t automatically promise forgetfulness. Forgiveness isn’t a return of trust. Just because we have forgiven, doesn’t mean we immediately can trust, or that we should. We are often hurt because we were unwise about whom we chose to trust. Forgiveness doesn’t mean we have to be stupid once again. A key to successful relationships is not just learning to trust, but learning whom to trust. Forgiveness includes self. Self is involved in forgiveness in two important ways. First, it’s all about self. We don’t forgive to help the offending person. They are likely unhurt and often unaware of our unforgiveness. We forgive because He commands […]
Fellowship
1 We proclaim to you the one who existed from the beginning, whom we have heard and seen. We saw him with our own eyes and touched him with our own hands. He is the Word of life. 2 This one who is life itself was revealed to us, and we have seen him. And now we testify and proclaim to you that he is the one who is eternal life. He was with the Father, and then he was revealed to us. 3 We proclaim to you what we ourselves have actually seen and heard so that you may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ. 4 We are writing these things so that you may fully share our joy.5 This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. 6 So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. 7 But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us […]
Positive Christianity
We are called to live a Christian life. It’s all about relationship, vertical, with our God, and horizontal, with mankind. If we are to spread the gospel, we need to talk less and live more. This life requires that we make vital decisions: to know, to sacrifice, to accept and to forgive. The decision to know. We can’t really claim to be in relationship unless we know the object of our relationship. In scripture this is often referred to as fellowship. We can’t know others until we first know God. “But if we are living in the light of God’s presence, just as Christ is, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from every sin.” 1 John 1:7. Real fellowship begins with life in Christ. More about this tomorrow. Spend some time in 1 John today and begin to meditate on it. The decision to sacrifice. Any relationship that doesn’t begin with the idea that I am going to give something is doomed. Too many relationships begin with the idea, how great this is for me. We must decide we are going to give. The decision to accept. This one […]
Go Now and Go All the Way
Our emotions should not determine our direction, but they can get us off the couch and can motivate us to do all that needs doing. The unemotional tend to over think everything and accomplish nothing. If we learn to trust our emotions and channel them with Spirit and intellect we can accomplish what needs doing. Remember we’re talking about love. Every great love story climaxes when the one who has been thinking too much finally does something, now and radically. In the movies, it usually involves running to stop a wedding or keep someone from getting on a plane. In the Christian walk, it may mean finally being brave enough to share our testimony with that hurting soul or speaking up to that friend that sin is killing. Emotions have a way of eating us up if we don’t act quickly and radically when they first arise. If you have an emotional acid indigestion, there’s probably something that needs doing. Get it done and get relief. Be blessed. Nick
Christian Emotion
Jesus wept. John 11:35 What place does emotion have in the Christian life? Ask that question and the answers will run from a prominent place to no place at all. Jesus displayed emotion. He cried. He was angry. He was tender with little children. So emotion clearly has a place. Yet His emotions did not control Him. They affected Him, but didn’t control Him. God created us with emotions. Our emotions are part of what makes us human. I like to think of emotions as the fuel in our lives. What kind of Christian would we be if there was no fire in our ministry, no passion in our testimony. But just as gasoline fuels but doesn’t drive a car; our emotions should energize but not direct our lives. There is nothing wrong with emotion in worship, but worship is directed by our wills and inspired by our spirit. Like every part of our lives, all our God given parts need to be involved. A Christian who is too intellectual lacks fire. One who is too emotional lacks a plan and direction. Don’t be afraid of God’s gift of emotion, just don’t be directed by it. Be blessed. Nick
