By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:35
Do you have a loved one who is not only unsaved, but seems about as far from God as you could imagine? Someone who hates the idea of being in church. I hope this story from the last Kairos weekend told by the leader of that weekend will encourage you.
Saturday morning, a team member approached me with worry and concern about a resident at his table. The concern was a common one – the resident was not participating and seemed quite angry.
This particular team member was a first timer, and I gave him a rather typical answer, “stick with it, we are only half way through and today will be a good day. Keep the faith.”
I was curious and wanted to gauge the resident myself, so I approached him during a break and asked, “How are ya…having a good time?”
His response was quick and to the point, “I hate it here!”
His eyes could have cut through steel. “I don’t want to be here, and I just can’t stand it. This is not for me.”
Inside, I was crushed. I managed to smile and told him, “Please try to stick it out. I think you’ll enjoy it.”
Shaking his head as I spoke, he snapped back, “I’m just telling you now, I hate it.”
I casually replied, “Remember what I told all of you Thursday night, we are not here to change you. In fact, if you disagree with everything we say this weekend, that’s okay. And keep in mind, if you want to leave, that’s okay too. Just let me know.”
Soon after that, lunch arrived. My spiritual advisor guessed he would bolt after eating lunch. At the time, I couldn’t disagree with his bleak assessment. Funny how God had other plans.
Over lunch, the resident who “hated it” slowly began talking to the team member. What I saw next will stay with me forever. Over the noise of a community room busy breaking bread, the team member slowly slid his chair toward the resident, made direct eye contact with him and listened. He listened to every word, never looking away from him.
As I saw this, I stopped eating and immediately prayed to God, “Father, send your wonderful Holy Spirit…now…let it pierce the roof of this conference room and descend on this resident.”
Lunch continued. The talking continued. The listening continued.
I jumped up, insisting to myself that I should continue praying…grabbing another team member, and urging him to join me in prayer. At this point, our prayer focus was dual. While we were concerned about the resident, we were equally concerned that the first-time team member would get incredibly discouraged if the resident were to leave.
We prayed that the resident would not only stay but that his life would be altered forever. We also prayed for reassurance that God’s will would be done and not ours. This is always the toughest prayer.
Lunch ended. Guess what else ended? His desire to leave.
The resident did more than just stay, he started actively participating; even asking at one point for one-on-one clergy counseling, which lasted more than 20 minutes. I remained in prayer. He returned to the community room with a huge grin on his face. I will never know what happened during that counseling session, but I will forever remember the clergy member whispering in my right ear, “God is good.”
Later that night, at open mike, the resident jumped to his feet, the first to share. I turned to my spiritual advisor, both of us dumbfounded, as we watched a now eager soul approach the microphone.
“I have tried to find God before in my life. I really did. But what’s happening here? This is just amazing. The love in this place is changing me in ways I can’t describe. I am just so happy to be here.”
Six hours prior to that, the quote was “I hate it here.”
Patient attentive listening and prayer. Is that really so hard to do? Even the hardest heart needs to be listened to, prayed for and loved.
Be encouraged and be blessed.
Nick
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