Author: Nick

I had a urology workup yesterday. It was painful but endurable. The results were fine. No real problems. I had known I needed the tests for a couple of weeks and I had been fearful of both the tests and the potential results.  I wasted much time and energy in those days in fear. Noticed I said “fear” not “nervous” or “anxious” or “apprehensive.” That was very brave of me. Those are the words we  use when we are fear people will think less of us because we fear. Isn’t that ridculous. Fear is a universal condition.  Jesus was wise. He repeatedly advised His disciples not to fear. They still ran like scared rabbits when his torturers showed up with torches in the night. We like to think that after the Holy Spirit fell they became fearless. That’s probably not true. At least not right away. In the years that followed they went to foreign lands, they were whipped, ridiculed, tortured and killed. I gotta think they were sometimes afraid. But they did it anyway. After the first couple of times, they were less fearful. They learned that God was with them and it wasn’t as bad as they feared. The […]

2 Corinthians 5:17 English Standard Version (ESV) 17 Therefore, if anyone is a new creation. 

At the end of a Kairos weekend we give each participant the opportunity to receive a cross. We tell them “Christ is counting on you” and they respond “I am counting on Christ.” For those of us with “altar calls” in our denominational arsenal we may look at this as an “acceptance” of Christ. We often grade the weekend by the number of guys who are still particpating on Sunday and who receive a cross.  In most cases, most of the guys take a cross. This time 6 did not.  We have to remember that Kairos is more complicated than this. It’s not a tent meeting or a revival. It’s not a Billy Graham Crusade. All great things.  Many of these men come in as  Christians, in some cases Christians with a better walks than the volunteers, but they may be tired or discouraged on Thursday. They are, after all, in prison, most with life sentences. On Sunday they are invigorated, encouraged and renewed. Mission accomplished.  Some have no relationship with Jesus on Thursday but are well on their way on Sunday. Mission accomplished.  Some are muslims or jews on Thursday and on Sunday; but they have a new […]

Much preparation goes into a Kairos weekend. That can’t be denied. Many people sacrifice for 36 guys. But we don’t get it all right. In fact, we don’t get most of it right. Sometimes it looks a little like a circus without a ringmaster. But it always seems to come out. You know it worked when one of your volunteers speaks Russian and a prisoner is trying to connect with his Jewish Russian roots. At the end this jew is proclaiming Jesus and daring his fellow inmates to stay with the program after we leave. You know it worked when a man who has been in prison since he was fifteen has to be prayed back for day three because the love is too much to handle. You know it’s working when the bloodiest prison in America becomes a model for prisons. You know it’s working when a man who’s grown old in prison says he’s learned to be a servant and he kind of likes it. You know it’s working when you keep blinking so the tears don’t show. You know it’s working when you love those who are unloveable and that’s just your fellow team members. The […]

Day 2 of Kairos 54 at Angola was a roaring success. The men were very receptive to all that was happening, the food was great, the talks inspiring, the Spirit present. What struck me the most on Day 2 was the power of fun. A Kairos weekend is really a lot of fun. Spend some time watching guys singing and dancing and clapping and you will see what I mean. Smiles were everywhere. Although there were certainly moments of appropriate seriousness, the day was basically . . . fun. Have we lost the power of fun in the church? I am sure our Lord was blessed by singing of simple songs done loudly and enthusiastically. They aren’t the latest worship tunes, nor were they backed up by a praise band. But the singing sure was fun. It seems silly for grown men to draw posters and then stand in front of each other and explain them, but it sure was fun. It’s a lost activity to spend a day just talking and listening and not to a television, radio, or ipad, but to other humans. But it sure was fun. It isn’t often that one rides with a car […]

John 14:6 English Standard Version (ESV) 6 Jesus said to him, “I am the truth, and

For almost everyone today will be an ordinary day. They will do pretty much what they do every day and a week from today they won’t be able to tell you anything special about today. But for some it will not. For some it will be the first day of their lives. They won’t remember it but will be told about it for as long as they live. The circumstances of today, their parents, the nation and place of their birth will impact their lives forever. For their parents it will be a special day. For most it will be happy. They will think about it often when the see the child grow and blossom and multiply. For others not so much. They will worry about their ability to feed and care for their new charge or whether the child will live for a day, a week or a year. They may be ashamed of the child and never wish to speak of the circumstances which brought the new life forward.  For others it will be special because they will marry the person they were destined to be with forever. For some they will start a new career or move […]

I had a nightmare last night. I was in court for the first day of trial and my client wasn’t there. I had this vague fear that I had forgotten to remind him about the trial date. Every effort I made to contact him was frustrated. My phone didn’t work. The phone I was loaned was more complicated than a nuclear power plant. This is a common theme in my nightmares. Sometimes I am back in the navy or in school (a nightmare in itself) and I am unable to complete some assignment no matter what I do.  I have completely lost control. Isn’t that really the nightmare of our lives: a total lack of control. That no matter what we do some past forgotten decision of ours has put us in a situation where we face disaster and can do nothing about it. It is said we face about 225 decisions a day. Some of us go through the day without much thought (not good) others obsess over each decision and are crippled in life by indecision.  Obviously most of these decisions are extremely minor and we make them completely out of habit: getting out of bed, brushing our teeth, […]